As I mentioned in the inaugural post of Creating Thirst Thursdays, as a homeschool mother, I know that I often place a great deal of pressure on myself, and on my children. I often feel that we have to academically exceed our peers. That the children's behavior must always be exemplary, and that we as a family must not have any stresses or issues. Because the world is looking at us, as homeschoolers, and if we have any problems, many people on the outside, will attribute them to homeschooling. That is a great deal of pressure for a family, let alone a child to be under.
The truth of the matter is that we are a regular family with regular issues, and we would have these regular issues whether our children were enrolled in school, or homeschooled. However, I may know that in my head, I at times succumb to the pressures.. which means I have high expectations of my children. And when that happens, you ( I ) can be a parent that is so busy correcting, teaching, guiding, molding, that you (we) are not taking the time to actually enjoy your child. Often times, our children, will begin to feel like that they cannot do anything right, because we are always wanting to guide them. It's like that saying , "You cannot see the forest for the trees." We can sometimes get so involved that we cannot see all the good things that our kids are doing.
When was the last time you complimented your child, and meant it?
This week, your assignment is to spend time just 'hanging out' with your child/ren. Playing games, out in the park, swimming, engaging in something. No fixing, no correcting.. spend time talking to your child about what is important to THEM. The goal here is nurture deeper conversation with your child. If this is new for you and your child, this may take some time. Don't give up, just keep at it. Keep your defenses down, and allow them to talk to you, without worry of repercussions.
Next, take this same idea to the next level. Not only, are you not going to fix them, you are going to concentrate on all the things that you are proud of. What have they accomplished lately? What is it about them, that makes you proud? Tell them! Make these times a routine. By doing that, your child will begin to drop their walls, they will trust you, feel safe to be who God created them to be, not who YOU think they should be. I will be praying for all of you. I pray that something here will help you and your child connect in a more meaningful way. I would love to hear about it.. leave me some comments! God Bless you and your family.